Showing posts with label coffee. Show all posts
Showing posts with label coffee. Show all posts

Wednesday, December 25, 2019

MLM Scam Products: Juice and Coffee

Do you like coffee but wish it was more healthy for you? Do you want to be white without the hassle of toxic creams laden with mercury? Have I got the products for you!




Experience health and beauty altogether in just a drink pack with hug quality fruits and vegetables extracts mixed together in a delicious fruity twist. Helps whiten skin with a slimming effect for guilt free indulgence.
Yes now you too can be white just with a simple sip of Lipoglow! Lipoglow will slim your figure and turn your skin white just like your favourite movie stars. It's got all the whitening ingredients like glutathione and collagen!  Mmmm yum!  Who does not like drinking collagen? Spike your coffee with a little collagen and you got yourself a Special Beauty Blend Beverage.


Collagen is not the only special ingredient in this coffee mix.



Tongkat Ali, Gotu Kola, Stevia, Agaricus Mushroom, Saw Palmetto, plus 12 fruits and vegetable extracts!  Now that's a proper coffee. Better than a hot black cup of joe at 6 am to kickstart the day. But if you are looking for an espresso drink there is also Mangosteen Cappuccino Coffee.

https://www.pmscoffee.com/products/mangosteen
With mangosteen, spirulina, brown sugar, ganoderma, gravitol, and gotu kota you will be losing weight and improving your health in no time!

If none of these drink mixes catches your fancy there are plenty more at the PMS website.

https://www.pmscoffee.com
Who needs boring real coffee with all that caffeine when you can drink these miracle mixes which will improve your health? Be sure to check the kiosks in the mall. They might be well stocked with Green Coffee and slimming green teas and all the other miracle drinks like King's Herbal.

Monday, June 18, 2018

Starbucks Espresso Machine Broken

Only in the Philippines have I ever walked into a Starbucks wanting an espresso drink only to be told, "Sorry sir but the espresso machine is broken so no espresso drinks. We have brewed coffee if you like."

No I do not want overpriced brewed coffee. I have plenty of grounds at home thank you very much. What I do not have is an espresso machine. 


They said it would be fixed in the afternoon but does it look like anyone is working on it?  They did not even have the decency to put an "Out of Order" sign on the machine.


I left empty-handed.

Wednesday, January 24, 2018

Family Medical Clinic and Coffee Shop

It was only a few months ago that a brand new Family Medical Clinic and Coffeeshop opened its doors to the public in the Philippines, the first of its kind anywhere in the world and a testament to Filipino efficient and creativity.



Patients waiting to see a doctor were able to have a hot cup of joe to keep them awake as they waited for their examination. The diuretic effects of coffee no doubt aided those who needed to give urine samples. In addition to coffee there was also ice cream and other healthy snacks for sale. There were a few drawbacks however. Patients we interviewed complained that the doctor always had rank coffee breath and those with breathing problems complained about the overwhelming scent of fresh ground beans and fresh brewed 3 in 1. All were satisfied with the level of patient care remarking that it was quite satisfying to know they were tended to by the only doctor/barista in the world.


But in a shocking twist of events this unique medical clinic recently closed its doors leaving the public and the world without a medical clinic/coffeeshop.



Rumour has it that the owners of this facility have opened up a Family Medical Clinic and Sari Sari store somewhere else in town, another first of its kind.

Sunday, October 1, 2017

The World's Rarest and Most Expensive Coffee

I love coffee.  Every morning and in the afternoon I have a very large cup. It's the equivalent of 2.5 cups. Years ago I used to sit in the cafe reading and drinking coffee for hours.  Living in the Philippines or anywhere in SEA means access to the world's rarest coffee:  Kopi Luwak.
Kopi luwak (Indonesian pronunciation: [ˈkopi ˈlu.aʔ]), or civet coffee, refers to the coffee that includes part-digested coffee cherries eaten and defecated by the Asian palm civet (Paradoxurus hermaphroditus).
Producers of the coffee beans argue that the process may improve coffee through two mechanisms, selection and digestion. Selection occurs if the civets choose to eat cherries. Digestive mechanisms may improve the flavor profile of the coffee beans that have been eaten. The civet eats the cherries for the fleshy pulp, then in the digestive tract, fermentation occurs. The civet's protease enzymes seep into the beans, making shorter peptides and more free amino acids. Passing through a civet's intestines the cherries are then defecated with other fecal matter and collected.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kopi_Luwak
The first time I drank this coffee was in Manila at a place called the Frazzled Cook.





I don't remember the taste.  It was coffee.  It was black. That's how it tasted to me. Like black coffee.  I could not tell that the beans had passed through the intestines of an animal on its journey to my cup.  Look, the cup even has Alamid written beneath a picture of the creature.  How cute and authentic.  The price was authentic too.  I think it was 750 pesos for one cup.  I had two and I bought a bag of whole beans for 3000 pesos.


The second time I was able to drink this rare coffee was in Kuala Lumpr.  


Again I do not remember the taste.  It was coffee. It was black.  And it was about $50 for a cup if I recall correctly.  I was told by the owner of the cafe that she personally selects the Kopi Luwak beans and that they are authentic.  See how they are stored in what looks like a small apothecary's bottle? See how she poured them out onto a plate to inspect like they are magic beans?

It would be inauthentic and suspicious if the beans came in large numbers since the traditional way to gather these beans is to allow the civet to eat what he selects and harvest them from wherever he chooses to drop them. If you ever come across large amounts of civet beans then you can read assure they are either fake or they are not collected the traditional way which is very problematic.
The traditional method of collecting feces from wild civets has given way to intensive farming methods in which civets in battery cage systems are force-fed the cherries. This method of production has raised ethical concerns about the treatment of civets due to "horrific conditions" including isolation, poor diet, small cages and a high mortality rate. Intensive farming is also criticised by traditional farmers because the civets do not select what they eat, so the cherries which are fed to them in order to flavor the coffee are of poor quality compared to those beans collected from the wild. According to an officer from the TRAFFIC conservation programme, the trade in civets to make kopi luwak may constitute a significant threat to wild civet populations.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kopi_Luwak
At a market in Kuala Lumpur I did come across large cans of civet beans for sale which automatically set off my warning radar.  It was obviously fake.  I asked the seller how they were harvested and he reassured me it was the traditional method and that the coffee was genuine. Very doubtful.

The third time I had the pleasure of drinking a cup of the world's rarest and most expensive coffee was a few days ago.  At the mall.

 



This coffee tasted sharply bitter. A little tangy. I don't know how to describe it really.  It tasted like black coffee.  The thrill is knowing that you are drinking a coffee brewed from beans which passed through an animal's intestines and then out his butt. Don't tell anyone but harvesting coffee beans from faeces is the only way the slaves were able to obtain beans to drink.
The origin of kopi luwak is closely connected with the history of coffee production in Indonesia. In the early 18th century the Dutch established the cash-crop coffee plantations in their colony in the Dutch East Indies islands of Java and Sumatra, including Arabica coffee introduced from Yemen. During the era of Cultuurstelsel(1830–70), the Dutch prohibited the native farmers and plantation workers from picking coffee fruits for their own use. Still, the native farmers wanted to have a taste of the famed coffee beverage. Soon, the natives learned that certain species of musang or luwak (Asian palm civet) consumed the coffee fruits, yet they left the coffee seeds undigested in their droppings. The natives collected these luwaks' coffee seed droppings, then cleaned, roasted and ground them to make their own coffee beverage. The fame of aromatic civet coffee spread from locals to Dutch plantation owners and soon became their favourite, yet because of its rarity and unusual process, the civet coffee was expensive even during the colonial era.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kopi_Luwak
I am wary of this third experience. 200 pesos for a cup of the rarest and most expensive coffee in the world? I don't believe it.  The barista assured me it was genuine.  The tiny amount of beans assured me that it was genuine. The relatively high cost, relative to everything else on the menu, assured me that it was genuine. I have passed by this coffee stand many times and I do not recall seeing that they sold civet coffee.  It could be that I was not paying attention but it could be that this is a brand new offering.

It's nice to think I can go to the mall and buy a cup of the world's rarest and most expensive coffee for 200 pesos but after all the trouble I have had buying authentic honey I have my doubts and like any good skeptic must suspend my judgement on the matter for now.

Thursday, July 27, 2017

Filipinos Love Fake Coffee

So much fakery here in the Philippines.  You can buy a pair of fake Nikes or a fake iPhone or fake name brand anything.  You can buy pirated DVD's.  You can even buy fake rice!

Surrounded by all that this fakery is it no surprise that Filipinos love fake coffee?


                                                        Fake Coffee                                                  Real Coffee

Sari-sari stores, convenience stores, they all sell these little packets of fake coffee.  Oh you can buy real coffee (they call it native coffee) but its not what is normally drunk.  They prefer this sugary fake stuff.  Some people even add more sugar as if there isn't enough already!

The packets sell for 7 pesos so if you have two a day every day (one in the morning and one in the afternoon) that comes out to 420 pesos a month! You can buy 1 kg of real coffee from the market for 200 pesos and that will last for a lot longer than a month.  And you will get more cups out of it.  

And think of all the trash!  Millions of Filipinos drinking a packet a day!  The Philippines already has a litter problem. People here throw their trash on the ground without batting an eye. These fake coffee packets are only adding to the litter problem.

Saving money and the environment? So what! Fake coffee smells delicious, tastes sweet, and is easy to prepare and that's what they prefer.