A Typical Sunday Morning In My Neighbourhood

Who am I kidding?  This is a typical morning practically every day in my neighbourhood. This guy has his car speakers blasting so loud I can hear it half a block away.  I can feel the boom-boom-boom rattling through the air.

A typical morning in the Philippines is very, very noisy with crowing roosters, barking dogs, and loud bass all competing for who can be the loudest. It's also a bit stinky with people lighting fires to either cook or dispose of garbage and leaves.

Ridiculous.

This video was taken at 6:11am on Sunday morning. 

Tribute to the PNP

I posted this video my Youtube page last week.  It's CCTV footage of a deadly drug raid sped up and set to "Yakety Sax" which, incredible as it may seem, really does make everything funny. 

Enjoy.

The Shortcut

What would ease the traffic woes in the Philippines?  For starters following the rules. Being patient.  Not zigging and zagging and cutting around lines of stalled cars or turing down alleys which are crowded because everyone else is seeking a quick way out. 

One can understand private drivers doing these maneuvers but not taxis.  Isn't keeping the passengers safe a priority for taxi drivers?  You would think so.  

Here's a compilation of clips from driving in a taxi. He does not shun taking shortcuts.

Ordering A Pizza Proves How Broken Society Really Is In The Philippines

Ordering food in the Philippines provides more proof that society in this country is broken. No one is to be trusted in this country. Everyone is a potential thief. Here are some recent experiences with ordering food.

1. McDonald's

I called McDo to bring me a few orders of curly fries and sundaes. The thing is you have to tell them how much money you have so they can bring you exact change because the driver does not carry any.

It's not that it's such a hassle to tell them what kind of bills I have and how much change to bring. But why can't the driver just bring a few pesos for change? Are they scared he will get robbed or that he will steal it?  In other countries drivers carry change despite the risk of robbery so that's not a good excuse.

2. Shakey's

Enticed by their "Ber Bundle" ad I called to place an order. 

Only 990 pesos for all that food. Who wouldn't place an order? Can I use my credit card please? Why yes, sir, but we can't take your number over the phone so the driver will bring the terminal to you. Why can't you take my number over the phone? For your safety, sir.

Oh look there's the driver in the pouring rain with a credit card terminal. Unbelievable. I mean I really can't believe that there is such a great risk of giving out my credit card number over the phone. I have used my credit card to place orders over the phone and internet for years and have never ever had a problem with theft. If someone did steal my number I can rest assured the bank will immediately take care of the problem.

Here is Shakey's delivering for the second time.

Alright so third times the charm?  No.  When I called the third time to place an order I was told that their credit card machines are broken. No matter how much I reasoned with them they refused to take my number over the phone. Not even a manager, whom I assume would be the most trustworthy person there, would do it. They really are scared about fraud. I ordered anyway but had to pay in cash.

3. Greenwich

Hankering for some more pizza and saddened that Shakey's "Ber Bundle" deal was expired I decided to call Greenwich this time. Nice price but not great quality food. Same owners as Jollibee so maybe that explains it.  An hour later the driver pulls up.

Here he is with the machine.  But there's a problem!  It needs to be charged!

Even though it's plugged in this machine is not working. Thank goodness he brought two machines that weren't fully charged right??

Finally!  It works! The second machine that is.

This all reminds me of a quote from Karl Marx: "History repeats itself. The first time as a tragedy, the second time as a farce."  In this case the tragedy being that Filipinos are so untrustworthy I can't order with my credit card over the phone so the driver has to bring a credit card terminal and the farce being this guy bringing two credit card terminals which have no charge and can't be used!

Filipino Cuisine Set to be Big Trend in 2018?

Filipino cuisine is set to get a big boost next year.

http://lifestyle.inquirer.net/280115/filipino-cuisine-to-become-biggest-ethnic-food-trend-of-2018-says-report/

Like other immigrant populations before it, growing Filipino communities across the United States — from caretakers, nurses, tech and hospitality workers — have given rise to interest in Filipino cuisine, says the group. 

Likewise, the Philippines’ biggest fast food chain, Jollibee, has been aggressively opening locations in the United States, introducing diners to dishes like Palabok Fiesta (a noodle dish served with shrimp sauce, topped with pork chicharon, tinapa flakes (smoked fish flakes), sauteed pork and slices of egg); and pineapple-topped burgers. The chain has 35 restaurants across the U.S., along with locations in Vietnam, Hong Kong, Saudi Arabia, Qatar and Brunei.

http://usa.inquirer.net/8412/filipino-chefs-around-world-star-new-cookbook

“Most of the places where I’ve lived didn’t or still don’t have a single Filipino restaurant. Hardly anybody knows the cuisine. It’s always a struggle to make others understand what it really is all about.” 

“By doing this book, I hope I can help raise awareness and memorability for our food and culture. And hopefully silence that voice in my head nagging me to do something for the motherland!”

Quite a lot to unpack here.  Let's start with the OFWs.  The world puts out the call for labor and Filipinos scramble at the chance to get out of the country and earn real money at a real job which some of them even trained for and still can't make a living off of like nursing. Naturally enough these people bring their customs with them which includes their culinary traditions. Enough Filipinos migrate to a country and the Philippines starts to follow them with restaurants like Jollibee opening up near by.

But is Jollibee an appropriate representative of Filipino food? Is McDonalds a representative of American food?  No to both. Americans don't eat Big Macs, hash browns, french fries, and sundaes regularly at home.  This is stuff you eat out at restaurants.  Likewise with Jollibee.

The normal meal for the average Filipino is rice plus fried fish or fried chicken or some other fried meat or vegetable. Not burgers.  Spaghetti is usually reserved for celebrations and it is very sweet unlike Italian style spaghetti. The food pictured in this menu is restaurant food which does take a few cues from Filipino cuisine but remains essentially outside the realm of ordinary culinary experience and is not indicative of what Filipinos eat on a regular basis at home.

Jollibee is an aggressive imitation of McDonald's anyway.

Worried that his store, which had just started selling burgers, might get floored by the new competition, Tan Caktiong, a Filipino of Chinese descent, took a leaf from the Chinese military tactician Sun Tzu: he flew to the United States to know his future enemy. 

When he returned to the Philippines a few weeks later, Tan Caktiong brought with him an arsenal of ideas on how to fortify his store, called Jollibee, to face the newcomer.

http://www.nytimes.com/2005/05/31/business/worldbusiness/jollibee-stings-mcdonalds-in-philippines.html

As for the second article about the planned cookbook?  Take look at the pictures at the link.  The food is well presented and photographed nicely.  It's trick photography designed to sell the consumer an idea.  An idea which is far from reality.  No food, be it Filipino or American or Chinese, looks that good.

"It’s always a struggle to make others understand what it really is all about."

I am sure it is difficult to tell others what Filipino cuisine is all about.  But instead of romanticising or generalising the food, i.e. it's all about fish or chicken or pork, let's take a look at real examples of food Filipinos eat everyday. Admittedly these examples will come from restaurants. But these are not fast food restaurants and are therefore more representative of actual Filipino cuisine.

Roast chicken is very common sight and delicacy in the Philippines.

This is a restaurant featuring many homemade and authentic Filipino dishes. Yes that's a fly in the last picture. But never mind about that.  When the fly lands on the food and rubs his legs he doesn't alter the taste of the food.  So there's pork barbecue and lumpia and fish chopped up into various parts and whole lot of vegetable dishes.  More variety here than at Jollibees. No spaghetti and no burgers.  Will any of these dishes make the Filipino cookbook?

This restaurant has more variety than the previous one. Look at all those pots and pans. Each one containing something different. Beef and eggs, hot dogs and bologna, green beans, and various other dishes. This restaurant is also on the sidewalk right next to the road.  Patrons and food alike are covered in smoke as the cars and trucks blast their exhaust. Eating at shanty restaurants is a common practice in the Philippines and I dare say it adds to the overall culinary experience.

Back to the Filipino cookbook.

“By doing this book, I hope I can help raise awareness and memorability for our food and culture. And hopefully silence that voice in my head nagging me to do something for the motherland!”

Now that I have presented faithful and accurate representations of Filipino cuisine I hope you can see what is wrong with this statement. For outsiders the memorability of Filipino food lies in it's grody presentation and taste. Foreigners around the world time and again tell of the horrors Filipino cuisine has wrecked on their stomachs. This cuisine is not palatable to the non-Filipino unless it is considerably cleaned up and presented beautifully. Of course Filipinos love their food and culture. That goes without saying. Food instills memories like eating cotton candy as an adult and remembering that time long ago at the fair when you were a child.  It's a psychological fact that you are what you eat.

Proust taught us this long ago.

Undoubtedly what is thus palpitating in the depths of my being must be the image, the visual memory which, being linked to that taste, has tried to follow it into my conscious mind. But its struggles are too far off, too much confused; scarcely can I perceive the colourless reflection in which are blended the uncapturable whirling medley of radiant hues, and I cannot distinguish its form, cannot invite it, as the one possible interpreter, to translate to me the evidence of its contemporary, its inseparable paramour, the taste of cake soaked in tea; cannot ask it to inform me what special circumstance is in question, of what period in my past life. 

 https://www.fisheaters.com/proust.html

Retards in the Government 25

Part 25 of Retards in the Government.  There really are no words for a fitting introduction.  Its all too crazy and all too real.

August 16th

 http://cnnphilippines.com/news/2017/08/12/Duterte-war-on-drugs-cant-control-drug-problem.html

November 24th

https://www.rappler.com/nation/189444-duterte-mulls-resignation-cannot-control-drugs

Goodbye Duterte.

http://www.philstar.com/metro/2017/11/24/1761865/mmda-demolishes-2-barangay-halls-manila

Throughout the Philippines numerous houses and businesses are built on sidewalks or right on the edge of busy roads which is a great danger to everyone. That these offending structures are barangay halls is just more proof of nonsense from even the lower levels of government within the Philippines. They had enough money to buy expensive CCTV equipment but none to build in a proper location?

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/947801/ex-mayor-in-leyte-gets-prison-term-of-2-to-6-years-for-malversation

The mayor approved a voucher worth 380,000 pesos for a backhoe which was never delivered. Regulations prevent advanced payments?  Was he scammed? I know Filipinos are easily scammed. They will give you a product on credit but when hey go to collect there is no one to pa up!  Happens quite often.

http://news.abs-cbn.com/news/11/26/17/barangay-official-nabbed-in-davao-city-buy-bust

If the PNP had busted this guy the headline would be much different.  "Barangay official killed in Davao City buy-bust."

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/947809/pantaleon-alvarez-paga-bill-congress-gambling-franchising

Under the bill, all gaming operations would have to secure a legislative franchise from Congress, just like public utilities. 

Franchisees would subject to a 5-percent franchise tax on aggregate gross earnings. 

The full amount of tax collections would fund the charitable and social obligations of Pagcor and the Philippine Charity Sweepstakes Office (PCSO).

Let's pass a law that will mandate casinos to pay 5% of all earnings to congress which would then pass the money to the PCSO so it could fulfil its obligations. What could possibly go wrong with that amount of money changing hands? The PCSO is a sam as it stands. It's simply legal gambling sponsored by the government and design to compete will illegal gambling. Why not just take out the illegal gambling networks? What sense does it make for the government to compete with criminals? Search "PCSO corruption" and 75,000 results show up. 

http://www.philstar.com/headlines/2017/11/27/1762992/gadon-cannot-remember-where-he-got-information-impeachment-case

The impeachment if the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court rests on the unreliable testimony this man. I fail to understand how he even has standing to bring impeachment articles against anyone. This case should probably be tossed out but Duterte is so bent on ridding the highest level of government of political opposition that it will continue to the end.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/948029/teasing-gordon-would-dick-want-an-enhancement-or-a-reduction

“Senator Gordon wants the exclusion of certain procedures, which are related to his name,” Sen. Sonny Angara, chairman of the Senate Committee on Ways and Means, said in jest, referring to Sen. Richard Gordon, who is also called as “Dick” by some of his colleagues.

Making dick jokes during a Senate hearing.  How professional.

http://news.abs-cbn.com/news/11/27/17/pnp-ias-81-cops-dismissed-20-demoted-amid-war-on-drugs

So far, 81 PNP personnel have been dismissed from the service for violating police operational procedures in the war on drugs. 

From the 81, 5 were officers and 76 were non-commissioned officers. Twenty were demoted and 31 suspended.

But somehow it will all be different once the PNP takes the lead in the drug war again.

http://news.abs-cbn.com/news/11/27/17/pnp-chief-floats-vigilantism-in-fight-vs-erring-cops

Dela Rosa, who retires by year end, has revealed that one-third of the 150,000-strong PNP are "scalawags."

When Bato retires at the end of the year he is going to hunt down all 50,000 corrupt PNP officers because he is very dedicated to eradicating corruption from the ranks of the PNP.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/948270/bato-hints-drug-lords-behind-reuters-report-on-druggies-execution

But Dela Rosa, one of the President’s most trusted police officials, admitted that he has yet to see the Reuters report.

Drug lords are now investigative journalists.  Drug lords altered the video footage. It's so exciting that the PNP is going to be leading the drug war again. Be sure to read the report yourself:  https://www.reuters.com/investigates/special-report/philippines-drugs-surveillance/

https://newsinfo.inquirer.net/948244/duterte-resign-constitution-congress-improve

Constitutions are never perfect.  They are literally just words on a sheet of paper with an arbitrary meaning unless there are people who are committed to upholding the principles enshrined in the constitution.  So even if the Philippines had the best Constitution it won't be worth the paper it's written on so long as the culture of corruption continues.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/948193/breaking-president-rodrigo-duterte-revolutionary-government-speaker-pantaleon-alvarez

Speaker Pantaleon Alvarez said on Tuesday there was “nothing” Congress could do if President Rodrigo Duterte wishes to install a revolutionary government. 

“For me, the President has long stated [his intent to install a revolutionary government], and on the basis of the results of the elections, he achieved a very large mandate,” he told a news conference. 

“This means the people are in favor of it,” the Speaker said.

Politicians say all kinds of things during the campaign. That does not mean the people agree with everything the candidate they vote for says. According to Alvarez Duterte is a dictator already. It's just a matter of flexing his power whenever he so chooses. 

http://news.abs-cbn.com/overseas/11/28/17/roque-ph-unsure-which-side-to-take-in-case-of-us-north-korea-clash

The Philippine government said Tuesday it is uncertain which side to take in case of a military clash between North Korea and the United States and its allies, despite a mutual defense agreement between Manila and Washington.

Unbelievable!

http://www.gmanetwork.com/news/news/nation/634679/sotto-files-cyber-libel-rap-vs-cocoy-dayao-over-name-calling-in-silent-no-more-blog-post/story/

This however is not unbelievable. As has been shown previously filing frivolous lawsuits to tie up the courts and keep opponents busy with expenses is a common political tactic in the Philippines. So filing a lawsuit because some blogger said something about you that you don't like is par for the course.

Police Bathroom

Filipino toilets are generally filthy.  Some might be more clean than others but then you realise there is no paper to wipe yourself so what are you supposed to do?  But broadly and generally speaking the common household toilet, and even the public toilet, is vile.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/948092/households-have-more-cell-phones-than-functional-toilets-doh

The DOH, through its National Sustainable Sanitation Plan, aims to achieve a zero open-defecation status in all barangays by 2022. 

This is to deal with the fact that 7 million Filipinos still practice open defecation, especially in rural areas. 

Duque noted that giving away toilets alone would not solve the problem.

No kidding it won't solve the problem and I see they didn't mention the more common problem of urinating in public. The problem is cultural and not technological. There is no lack of technology in the Philippines but said technology is often utilised in the most improper or inefficient manner. Take the abundance of cell phones. What are they used for besides communication? Facebook drama. Give a Pinoy a can opener and he will look at you funny. Give a Pinoy a knife and he can open any can! The stores all sell toilet paper but I have yet to see any in the toilets of private businesses or in private household toilets. This begs the question: Why is toilet paper in stock and who is buying it?

The nasty toilet issue goes all the way to the top. I wonder what the toilets in Malacañang palace are like.  Is there paper or a bucket and ladle?

Here is a picture of a toilet at SM Supermarket.

Its very clean but there is no paper (those few napkins do not count), no seat, and not even a bucket of water.  Never leave the house with a full colon.

Recently I was at a police station and was able to document the lamentable condition of their CR.

Look at that toilet.  No lid to put down when you need to sit. No toilet paper. The floor is wet and filthy. The sign above the toilet is like a cruel joke.

Remember to flush? And there is a picture pointing to a handle! The toilet does not have a tank or a handle to flush.  So how are you supposed to flush?

By pouring water into the bowl.  This is also where you are to wash your hands. Out of frame and above the toilet is an additional sign.

Please flush the toilet and wash your hands. Again it's like a twisted joke.  You can't flush and you can't exactly wash your hands without making a huge mess.  What are you gonna do? Plunge your dirty hands into that huge vat of water?  That will pollute the water with fecal material. It's all too gross.

Now put all those pictures together and this is what you get:

Lovely huh? Really puts the discomfort in comfort room.