The Best Toilet in the Philippines

World Toilet Day 2019 has come and gone and most people probably did not even notice. World Toilet Day is not about celebrating toilets, of which there are many varieties in the world, but about raising awareness about toilets. Lack of toilets, especially in poorer countries, is a serious health threat.

https://news.mb.com.ph/2019/11/19/doh-stresses-need-for-toilet-in-every-filipino-household/

The Department of Health (DOH) on Tuesday said that Filipino households should prioritize building toilet facilities as the practice of open defecation poses health risks. 

“Many Filipinos can buy their cellphones but their households do not have proper toilet facilities. Maybe you can also prioritize the dignity of your family,” said Health Undersecretary Gerardo Bayugo during the observance of the World Toilet Day in Baseco Compound in Port Area, Manila. 

“Having a toilet is actually not a luxury. It is a requirement for the health and safety of your family,” he added. 

Bayugo said that the practice of open defecation is connected to different diseases, such as diarrhea, cholera, typhoid, and polio; as well as poor health conditions such as stunting and malnutrition. 

Moreover, the DOH said that the act of defecating in open spaces such as in fields and bodies of water, “also put children and women at risk of sexual harassment and abuse.”

United Nations Children’s Fund (UNICEF) Deputy Representative Julia Rees echoed the importance of the use of toilets. 

“Always use toilets to prevent the existence of flies [and] to be healthy and safe from the dangers of open defecation. [We] also advocate the practice of handwashing with soap before eating [and] after using the toilet to prevent eating your excrement,” said Reese. 

“We are challenging all local government units to prioritize sanitation in its effect to health, nutrition, education, and security of Filipino children. It’s time for the Philippines to focus on addressing the sanitation needs of people in urban slums, in remote and geographically isolated areas, and in indigenous communities,” she added. 

“As of 2015, about seven million Filipinos ay wala pang toilet; and 3 ½  million of them are in Metro Manila,” said Villar. The senator added that 5,000 toilets need to be constructed in Baseco Compound alone.

3.5 million people in Metro Manila do not have access to a toilet!  No wonder that city and its waterways are so disgusting. The DOH is talking about open defecation but I think a problem equally as great is that while some families do have toilets they are not proper toilets.  Remember the toilet  in an elementary school I wrote about?

https://philippinefails.blogspot.com/2019/07/elementary-school-cr.html

That is not a proper toilet.  No seat and no way to flush except dumping water down the hole. This is not an anomaly either.  Here are more toilets just as filthy.

The last one is at SM Supermarket. Gross huh? A company worth billions of dollars and this is the toilet they provide for their customers. 

Pooping outside and not burying it is certainly filthy and a health hazard but I would like to see the DOH address the issue of inadequate toilets as well.  And what about toilets at the mall which have no toilet paper?

Just kidding.  There is toilet paper in this bathroom but you have to grab as much as you need before conducting your business.

It's the same old same old. Everyone knows comfort rooms in the Philippines are not comforting in the slightest. Except for one.

https://newsinfo.inquirer.net/1192072/and-the-best-toilet-in-ph-can-be-found-in

Far Eastern University (FEU) has the best and the brightest “kubeta” in the Philippines. 

FEU, one of the country’s leading universities established by Dr. Nicanor Reyes in 1928, emerged as the big winner in this year’s Golden Kubeta Awards bankrolled by water distributor Maynilad Water Services Inc. 

It topped the schools and universities category and won the People’s Choice Award with more than 10,000 social media votes.

Is this really the best toilet in the Philippines? Really?

Look at that open bowl!  You have to take a dump with everyone watching! This is what passes for the best toilet in the Philippines.

Elementary School CR

With all the news about teachers renovating CR's to use as faculty rooms what better time than to post these pictures of an  actual elementary school CR.

There it is all its disgusting glory. The toilet is a seatless bowl and the only way to flush it is by filling up the bucket and pouring it down the drain. There is also no toilet paper. Instead there is the tabo. Here is how to use the tabo:

Upon entering the toilet, you should make sure that the pail have enough water. If it's not full... start refilling it while getting out of your pants and panty. Yepp... use the hook at the door to hang them there. This way you can be sure that your clothes will not be soiled while you are doing your business.  

It might be a little bit scary at the start but all you have to do is like this: sit or squat in the toilet bowl then do your business. After that get the tabo with your right hand and put some water in, wet your left hand and get a little soap and then wash your buttocks with soap and water. After that get some more water again using the tabo just to continue washing your buttocks till it's thoroughly clean. Now it's the time you need a toilet paper or towel to dry your buttocks. 

https://web.archive.org/web/20150514063839/https://www.the-philippines.info/toilet_hygiene.php

Heaven forbid if one of the children have to go number 2. There is certainly no towel or soap in that CR. The soap and towel are outside at the sink where the hands are washed. No doubt the door handle is contaminated with faecal matter.

With no roof over the CR everything that happens in there can be heard by everyone in the classroom. Who wants to hear the splashing of urine or the grunts of a bowel movement? No roof over the CR also means that every smell made in there will pollute the breathing air of the classroom. How can anyone study with the smell of piss and poop stinking up the room?

On the plus side at least no one has to leave the room if they have to go. No hall passes needed!

Three Toilets in Three Restaurants

It's always instructive to take note of the toilets in any eating establishment. Their level of cleanliness is a good gauge by which to judge the rest of restaurant. If there is no soap in the CR it means the servers and cooks have very dirty hands! So here's a review of three CRs in three different restaurants.

CR Number 1

This toilet is clean but where is the toilet paper?  There is not even a bucket of water!

Oh here it is! On the wall. On the other side of the CR. Take a dump and then waddle on over to grab a few sheets or grab a handful before you start your business. A nice sink to wash your hands but where is the soap.  Are you supposed to dry your hands with that flimsy toilet paper?

Outside of the CR is the proper wash basin with soap. But still no paper towels.

CR Number 2

This CR has a roll of toilet paper which is good.

Outside however is another sink with no paper towels for drying your hands.

CR Number 3.

Again no toilet paper and no soap.  Why in the world would you rub water all up your butt if there is no soap to wash your faecally fingers afterwards??

And now for the sinks.

The first sink is inside the CR and has no soap and no paper towels.

The second one is outside. Note the trashcan but the absence of paper towels and soap.

Thinking about this in light of recent revelations regarding various tourist spots violating environmental laws and not even having proper medical facilities makes one wonder: Do you really think that these spots are furnished with proper toiletery sanitation? Who doubts but that in Boracay, Bohol, Sipalay, and elsewhere one is unable to properly cleanse themselves after doing their business? For women this can be especially problematic and messy because of certain monthly biological functions. This thought is more concerning when one considers that those serving and cooking the food are doing so with unwashed hands. All throughout this country people are walking around with dirty butts and dirty hands!

It's gross and it's not just restaurants. It's even government offices.

But that is for another time!

Police Bathroom

Filipino toilets are generally filthy.  Some might be more clean than others but then you realise there is no paper to wipe yourself so what are you supposed to do?  But broadly and generally speaking the common household toilet, and even the public toilet, is vile.

http://newsinfo.inquirer.net/948092/households-have-more-cell-phones-than-functional-toilets-doh

The DOH, through its National Sustainable Sanitation Plan, aims to achieve a zero open-defecation status in all barangays by 2022. 

This is to deal with the fact that 7 million Filipinos still practice open defecation, especially in rural areas. 

Duque noted that giving away toilets alone would not solve the problem.

No kidding it won't solve the problem and I see they didn't mention the more common problem of urinating in public. The problem is cultural and not technological. There is no lack of technology in the Philippines but said technology is often utilised in the most improper or inefficient manner. Take the abundance of cell phones. What are they used for besides communication? Facebook drama. Give a Pinoy a can opener and he will look at you funny. Give a Pinoy a knife and he can open any can! The stores all sell toilet paper but I have yet to see any in the toilets of private businesses or in private household toilets. This begs the question: Why is toilet paper in stock and who is buying it?

The nasty toilet issue goes all the way to the top. I wonder what the toilets in Malacañang palace are like.  Is there paper or a bucket and ladle?

Here is a picture of a toilet at SM Supermarket.

Its very clean but there is no paper (those few napkins do not count), no seat, and not even a bucket of water.  Never leave the house with a full colon.

Recently I was at a police station and was able to document the lamentable condition of their CR.

Look at that toilet.  No lid to put down when you need to sit. No toilet paper. The floor is wet and filthy. The sign above the toilet is like a cruel joke.

Remember to flush? And there is a picture pointing to a handle! The toilet does not have a tank or a handle to flush.  So how are you supposed to flush?

By pouring water into the bowl.  This is also where you are to wash your hands. Out of frame and above the toilet is an additional sign.

Please flush the toilet and wash your hands. Again it's like a twisted joke.  You can't flush and you can't exactly wash your hands without making a huge mess.  What are you gonna do? Plunge your dirty hands into that huge vat of water?  That will pollute the water with fecal material. It's all too gross.

Now put all those pictures together and this is what you get:

Lovely huh? Really puts the discomfort in comfort room.

Toilet paper? We don't need no stinking toilet paper!

Imagine being in the mall having lunch with your friends.  All of a sudden your tummy starts rumbling and you feel the urge to go.  You race to the bathroom ready to relive yourself.  When you open the stall you see this:

There's no toilet paper! WHERE'S THE TOILET PAPER??? 

Don't be silly.  Its right here:

Why would toilet paper go inside the stall?  Surely its better placed outside to monitor it for theft. They can't risk anyone stealing toilet paper.  Never mind the fact that Filipinos use their hands and a bucket of water to wipe themselves. This totally makes sense. 

So always remember that in the Philippines there is no toilet paper in the public toilets. If there is it will be either outside the stall or hidden away someplace and you might have to pay for it! 

What does it matter anyway? Why all the fuss about hiding the toilet paper when Filipinos do not use it?  They literally use a bucket and water to wipe themselves.  Even though they sell toilet paper at the stores you will not find it in a typical Filipno house but you will find a large slimy bucket full of nasty water and a ladle.  Even a toilet in a government office might not have any paper.

The lesson is always bring your own toilet paper and never shake hands with a Filipino.